Showing posts from May, 2015

Julie Rodgers - Freedom through Constraint (a video)

I just watched this video for the third time and the 19 minutes passed by once again in a flash. Julie Rodgers is that captivating to watch. Her story helps too. I find that a lot of what she says resonates with me, perhaps because I've reached the same conclusions as she has at this point in my life.

If you've been reading her story on her blog, you'll have learnt that she developed a relationship with Jesus at a young age, but also found herself attracted to girls pretty early on. After years of struggling, she came out to her family who promptly whisked her to an ex-gay ministry where she spent the next 9 - 10 years "being loved really well", yet never experiencing an orientation change. Find out more about her story in the video, I won't spoil it for you.

Well, I do realise that having role models like her is really encouraging for people like me. I have yet to meet another gay person in the large megachurch that I belong to and in the meantime, I'm …

On gay identity

It's a good thing I didn't post this when I wanted to and waited till now to do so. But perhaps it's all arranged by God. I don't know.

Anyway, I've recently been thinking a lot about my identity. Or rather, how my gay identity and my identity as child of God can be possibly be integrated. Or not.

As I was praying two weeks ago, I felt like God gave me a verse, of which I've since memorized and it was this:

I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Marvellous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.
Psalm 139:14
Wow. I don't usually have a knack from memorizing Scripture, but this verse really stood out to me. Now let me elaborate.

If I am gay, and if that is disordered, how can I be fearfully and wonderfully made? And if I am not, then I cannot praise God can I? But I know and I believe that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Then how do I reconcile my gay identity with that then? Should I celebrate it then? But I can't bri…

The Goodness of Singleness - an excerpt

"What does this mean for our attitude toward marriage and family? Paul says it means that both being married and not being married are good conditions to be in. We should be neither overly elated by getting married nor overly disappointed by not being so - because Christ is the only spouse that can truly fulfil us and God’s family the only family that will truly embrace and satisfy us.
With this background, we can better understand how radical Paul’s statements are regarding singleness and marriage. Stanley Hauerwas argues that Christianity was the very first religion that held up single adulthood as a viable way of life. He writes, “One… clear difference between Christianity and Judaism [and all other traditional religions] is the former’s entertainment of the idea of singleness as the paradigm way of life for its followers.1 Nearly all ancient religions and cultures made an absolute value of the family and of the bearing of children. There was a no honor without family honor, a…

On judging


The secret thoughts of an unlikely convert - an excerpt

"What good Christians don't realize is that sexual sin is not recreational sex gone overboard. Sexual sin is predatory. It won't be "healed" by redeeming the context or the genders. Sexual sin must simply be killed. What is left of your sexuality after this annihilation is up to God. But healing, to the sexual sinner, is death: nothing more and nothing less. I told my audience that I think that too many young Christian fornicators plan that marriage will redeem their sin. Too many young Christian masturbators plan that marriage will redeem their patterns. Too many young Christian internet pornographers think that having legitimate sex will take away the desire to have illicit sex. They're wrong. And the marriages that result from this line of thinking are dangerous places. I know, I told my audience, why over 50% of Christian marriages end in divorce: because Christians act as though marriage redeems sin. Marriage does not redeem sin. Only Jesus himself can …

On Sacred Tension - A blog

Yesterday, as I was reading Vines' "God and the Gay Christian" for a second time, I decided to check out Stephen Long's blog at Sacred Tension.

It convinced me that celibacy is not for all. Yes, to some, God might have called them to it, but for others, it can be a terrible burden to bear. It was for Stephen.

When Side B (the side that believes that gay sex is sinful) became too much for him to bear, he developed a cutting habit and was on the verge of suicide. That is just heartbreaking.

Like him, I've heard the story of Rob and Linda Roberston and the tragic story of how her son Ryan came out to her and later died due to an overdose of drugs. They were present at the Exodus conference 2 years back and after sharing their story, there was nary a dry eye in the room. They shared that it was how they insisted on his obedience to Christ on the issue of his gayness that led to his death. It was what caused him to hate himself.

Just like Stephen.

Being faithful to Ch…

Compelling Love & Sexual Identity - A Film

While looking through the blog of an acquaintance I met at the Exodus Conference 2013, I chanced across a link to this film - Compelling Love & Sexual Identity (the film is linked down below).

The directors pose a question at the beginning of the film (and I paraphrase): "If there was a person whose beliefs are different from you sitting across a table, how would you connect with that person?" And they proceed to interview different ones to see how they would answer that question.

It's a great film where they go across the United States of America interviewing people across the LGBT spectrum and their friends and families for us to gain an insight on how truly diverse LGBT people are. It allows us a peek into their lives and helps us understand their motivations, their hopes, and their fears. I would recommend it to people who might not have any interaction with LGBT people.

The only gripe I have is how slow-paced this film was. Perhaps it was because I'd just wa…

Idols and Infatuations

I just finished reading a brilliant book by Timothy Keller titled "Counterfeit Gods - The Empty Promises of Money, Sex, and Power, and the Only Hope That Matters". It is really good. You should go read it.

I realised how even things like ministry success can become an idol even though we profess to be serving God. It is not God that we are seeking, it is recognition instead. So we've gotta be careful. "All good things can become idols", Keller declares.

A useful chapter at the end tells us 4 ways we can spot the idols in our lives.

#1: If we think about it all the time
#2: If we spend too much money on it
#3: How we respond to unanswered prayers and frustrated hopes
#4: Our most uncontrollable emotions

That set me thinking. My infatuations have been people I couldn't get out of my head. And it was rather uncontrollable. They just invaded my thoughts. I knew that that was something I did not want. They might be idols, but they weren't those I actively cu…